Sunday, May 6, 2007

HOW TO BE A DIVA Chapter two

Well Darlings,

I'm soooo sorry it took so long to get this part up, but my dear friend "Mean Kitty" has been going back and forth to make sure that she and her darling niece have it right.

Now in this part we are discussing one of the MOST important foundations of Divadom---and no my dears I'm not talking "max factor" or "covergirl" , We are referring to what is important to help you get the Diva Life you desire so much.

This is your foundation to build on----now for those of you who are finally coming into your Divaness late in life, do not feel left out. This part of life never stops----and in this case this old dog is still learning a few new tricks.

Now what are we talking about??? Hmmmmm??? Why EDUCATION of course!!!

The young have no idea how important Education is to help begin to become a Diva, they waste an important part of their life and then spend years trying to catch up or years of saying to themselves "What the H#$% Happened?" If only they paid attention at the beginning.

Being a Diva is more than looking beautiful and having a lot of Diamonds. Being a Diva is having the wearwithal to work to obtain the Diva life. And Education is the Foundation to the Diva Life.

So Possums here we goooo~~~~~


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EDUCATION


The first and foremost thing a Diva needs and will seek and get is A GOOD EDUCATION. And a Diva knows that an education is on going in life because a Diva NEVER STOPS LEARNING.

As a Diva is growing up she feels that school is a bore, because a Diva wants to play; the mind set is “I want to have fun”, BUT without an education a Diva will not have the tools to finance and live the Diva life. It’s important for the Diva to balance getting an education and wanting to play. As a matter of fact all of a Diva’s life is a balancing act.

Young people think that they know it all, but they don’t, they think what they see on television is for real but they have not learned to discern, to find the real truth, they will follow without thinking who ever is the political glamour queen or king and think that their message is gospel. A Diva knows that is not so.

For Example: A lot of people think that Al Gore’s message on Climate Change is brought upon by Human beings as being the gospel truth, but many, many climatologiests have found through careful scientific research that it’s really cyclic----that 1000 years ago the earth was much warmer, that Vikings were growing wheat in Greenland, but then it began to get cold, until it became the weather that we are familiar with, and wheat hasn’t grown in Greenland in the last 600 years. Al Gore is claiming that the seas will rise 17 feet with the melting of the North Pole; Scientists are saying that it will rise only 17 inches and that the South Pole is getting colder and the reason that ice shelf’s are cleaving off is because of weight.

The point is this--- a Diva will search for the Truth and not believe everything she hears because a Diva is aware of falsehoods and deliberate mis-information so that politicians and other groups will be able to promote their own agenda.

When a Diva is in college she will also beware of any teacher that will promote one political agenda and not allow room for other thoughts, those teachers and professors are the worst kind and a Diva will beware of groups that promote a Stalinist type agenda under the disguise of political awareness.

A Diva will remember the adage “If you promote a lie long enough and hard enough the public will come to believe it” (Joseph Gobbles, Hitler’s propaganda minister)

A number of young people think that the “gangsta life” is the way to get a head but it only leads them down a path of self destruction and death. A Diva is way too smart to fall for those falsehoods, because a Diva knows that the real power is what is behind the scenes. Not the performers, but the investors. Because a performer is here today and forgotten tomorrow, but money from a solid investment is permanent. (Remember Brittany Spears’ meltdown)

Because of that A Diva has to constantly remind herself that EDUCATION IS IMPORTANT, MORE IMPORTANT THAN BOYS OR FUN because the fun will come AFTER the Diva has her tools and weapons sharpened to outsmart the fools and a Diva is never a fool.

A Diva will find ways to make Education interesting, she will ask her teachers questions that she needs to find the answers for. She will not be a pest about it, but demonstrate to the teachers that she wants that education. She is not trying to be a teacher’s pet, but looking for a teacher to mentor her, she will cultivate those teachers that have the education smarts to offer her.

In time, especially in High School, having letters of recommendation from several teachers can be a plus to help get college grants to get into the college a Diva wants to go to.

A Diva will go to school, work hard to get excellent grades without looking like the class brain and knows that grammar school and high school and its entire teenage angst are only transitory and only training grounds to learn to excel in the world. She will GET a college education so that she can succeed in the world, earn tons of money and maintain being her own woman.

A Diva will not develop a crush on a teacher, especially in college because it will distract her from her DIVA goal. Nor will a Diva develop a crush on a boy because he looks “dreamy”, because a Diva KNOWS that old dreamy boy will develop a gut; lose his hair and eventually his looks.

In school a Diva will develop friends that look like they are planning to go places but not do stupid things such as drinking, drugs, fast reckless driving. She will develop both female and male friends---the male friends are handy for a quick date for any of the school events, but she will never commit herself to any one boyfriend, because a Diva is going places and doesn’t need that kind of baggage that doesn’t measure up to the Diva Standards to hold her back

While she is at school she will know that at home she will have her parents as a support group to give her the adult take on life---the only time this can be difficult is if a Diva has toxic parents. If that is a problem a Diva would be wise to seek a school consular or teacher to help her focus on her goals.

No matter what field of work a Diva chooses she will get an excellent education in areas of finance, business, legal understanding, medical, religion, literature, music (and more than just rap, rock or hip-hop----you have Got to know classical music), politics as well as in the mundane areas such as auto mechanics, home repair, and know the mundane stuff such as how to cook, sew a button, fix a hem and get stains out of clothing.

When a Diva goes to College she will seek a degree in which it will afford the most opportunity to earn the DIVA Money, such degrees as Accounting, Business administration/management, computer science, information sciences and systems, marketing/marketing management, computer engineering, Economics/Finance. She will not ignore the degrees of Journalism or Media Marketing either. Wherever she can earn Diva Bucks is where the Diva will go, forget Theatre arts and Music---there are too many starving actors and musicians out there. The Diva can minor in such fields especially if she plans to work in the support areas of film and theatre, such as actor agencies, set design, etc. but she must keep her eye on the Diva Bucks.

The Diva will also look into the fields of technology, consulting and investment fields as well as real estate, biotech, pharmaceutical companies and health care, and other science-oriented companies, as well as private equity firms, and she should be aware of ‘boutique’ consulting firms that are sometimes spin-offs of larger companies.

After a Diva graduates from college (with no less than a MBA) she will NOT stop her education, she will continue to take classes than she can squeeze in her busy Diva life that will help expand her education and awareness. She will take seminars especially in the field that she has studied, she will also take seminars (that don’t sound like a possible rip off) to help her learn other ways to earn the Diva Bucks. The Diva will go to conferences, to learn and network so that she can always rise up in her job and earn more Diva Bucks.

A Diva will learn to read and understand the financial pages of the newspaper especially if she wants to learn how to invest her money to make more money.

As a matter of fact a Diva will be a borderline “news junkie” because she knows what happens in one part of the world will affect her stock income. And I’m not referring to the 10 second sound bite on CNN, She WILL read the Newspapers, magazines, and journals.

A Diva will intellectually be a knowledgeable well rounded woman, even smarter than the men she has to deal with, but she will also know how to milk a man or even another woman for his/her knowledge, especially if it is to the Diva’s advantage.

A Diva will learn a second language, but will not let on that she knows the language, this way if they talk behind her back, she’ll be one up on them. By pretending to not know the language, her competitors will be apt to speak more freely around her, and a Diva will gain a great advantage.

A Diva will be computer savvy and not afraid of electronics, she’ll know how to program a VCR better than 7 year old. In some fields, the better she knows how to work around a computer the better for her. Think of Ms. Garcia in the T.V. show “Criminal Minds” or Abby in “NCIS” or the beautiful Russian computer programmer in the Bond movie “Goldeneye”.

A Diva will cultivate friends both in high and low places, for it is important not only what a Diva knows but whom a Diva knows, for a Diva can be as devious as “Laura Mars” and know where to have well placed friends in “low places” so she can get the information and well placed friends in “high places” so she can call in a favor, but she also needs to remember she too may be called to pay back the favor as well.

A Diva will be wise to also place a certain distance between herself and those who are in a position to help her---to avoid intimacy will help the Diva remain clear headed and focused.

A Diva will learn the value of Networking in College because they will eventually become the contacts one needs in business (I will re-peat this frequently)

A Diva will develop an extensive proper English speaking vocabulary and avoid foul words and stumbling sayings such as “er, um, a like ya know, a like a, gee that’s hecka bad, gee Dude, where you at, get your freak on, Wassup, etc.” The only time she would ever use those words is when she is with her nearest and dearest.

But out in the real world, where you are earning the Diva Bucks, what you say and how you say it is what other people will judge you by and a Diva knows that and by speaking correctly, using all the right and proper phrases, people will think she’s is 24 karat gold and not vermeil----Because a Diva is always 24 karat gold and never vermeil.

A Diva will know how to shoot a gun, shot pool, play poker or Texas hold ‘em and still be a lady when she goes for the throat.

A Diva will develop a well rounded and well-modulated speaking voice so that the sound of it is not grating on a person’s ear but will captivate a person. This will also extend to her telephone voice. For a Diva knows that how one speaks will also raise the bar. Jeff Foxworthy, one time in his comedy routine, explained how much a person loses confidence if their banker or Doctor talked like a redneck. Although that was said as a joke it IS true in real life.

Because of her work at getting a good education a Diva will know how to get a conversation going by using the principle of H.E.L.P, H---hobbies, E---entertainment, L----literature, P----politics.

But most of the time the conversation at a party hardly ever gets past E---entertainment, unless one switches to Finance which can always be to a Diva’s best advantage (more on that later)

A Diva is also smart enough to avoid the dangerous minefields of Politics, Religion and Sports especially with men; even if she knows the subject thoroughly even if she has an investment in a sports team or a possible political candidate. The only time a Diva will ever slide into the field of Politics is to see which candidate maybe good or what congressional bill may affect her income or investments.

A Diva also knows that if a man remains on those subjects exclusively especially religion and sports then he is to be avoided if one doesn’t want to get bored, unless there is information to be milked to the Divas advantage.

A Diva is never a member of one political party or another, because SHE KNOWS ALL PARTIES WILL LIE TO WIN VOTES but will vote or chose the party and/or candidate that will do the best for her investments and life style.

In researching something a Diva will always check her facts thoroughly and not be taken in by half-truths, rumors or gossip. And that should be a Diva’s Mantra.

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There my Dears, and that is only the beginning, there is sooo much more learn. From time to time I and my friend Mean Kitty will expound and expand further on covered topics, that is because we are always finding something new----and it's always wise for a Diva to be updated.

Now I want to tell you a deliteful story~~~~I asked my friend when did she know that her niece at a very young age, was a Diva in training and she told me this.

{When my niece was very little and she and her brothers and parents would come to visit, she didn't want to nap on the couch like her brother's did, oh no, she wanted to nap on Auntie's bed that had the nice soft velvet pillows on it--I had to send those pillows frequently to the dry clearners to get the drool off.

Later when she was a little older I'd find her doing makeup experiments with my good cosmetics, Clinque etc. anything you bought at Macy's or Nordstrom (Thank God I hid my Chanel lipsticks from her) anything that was from a drug store she would instintivly avoid---I lost a lot of cosmetics that way.

But the thing that really convinced me and her parents that she was a Diva in Training was this event. My brother and his wife took all three kids, to a large shopping mall, the boys as always needed new clothes, so my brother took my niece to get an ice cream while my sister-in-law shopped in the boys department, my niece always thought shopping for boys clothes was boring, that was one of her first words in fact.

Well at the mall various car dealerships were also showing their most expensive car models, like BMW, Volvo, etc. with velvet ropes around the cars and sales reps at the ready.

My brother and niece came out of the ice cream shop after having ice cream, and my brother was planning to clean his daughters fingers and hands off of the chocolate ice cream dribbles, and that is when she looked up and saw IT!!!

It happened to be a bright shiny red Ferrari! My niece screamed and said "DADDY I WANT!! I WANT!!" Proceeded to run to the car, ducked under the velvet ropes and repeatedly padded her sticky ice cream fingers all over the bright red Ferrari fender still saying "Daddy I want! I want" By the way she was all of three years old---

My poor embarssed brother had to step over the ropes, picked up his daughter, my diva in training niece, like she was a sack of potatos, and she kept screaming her mantra and kicking her legs. In the meantime a nice looking young sales man dressed in smart looking suit came up with a clean cloth and cleaning solution and very politily asked my brother "And how soon sir would you like to take possession of this fine car?" and my brother stepping back over the ropes with my three year old niece under his arm replied "NOT UNTIL SHE'S 21!"

And that is when we knew she was a Diva.}

~~~~Well Darlings didn't I tell you it was a deliteful story and the little dear, altho she's grown up now, is still that way.

Mmmmmm well Darlings it's time for my evening martini, and my massage.

Until later.

Divafablous drawing the curtain and sipping a deliteful drink.