Love and Joy Come to you and a Merry New Year~~~

Hello My Diva Darlings,

Yes, yes, I know I haven’t posted in sometime, but I have to admit the joys of adopted Grandmother hood has been keeping me a bit busy, along with family events, my friends, events, my Ladies who Lunch, events, my darling little dog Princess, managing my finances and more events.

I have to say that the stupidity both at the State Capitol and in Washington is unprecedented; as a matter of fact I do not think we have had an intelligent President since Franklin D. Roosevelt. At least he was a Democrat that you could stomach, even my Father, a conservative Republican, liked the man.

That is not to say that young Obama is stupid, I do not believe he is, but he is young and unseasoned and untested---I am of two minds on his election to the Presidency.

First---he had only become involved with politics in his first season as a Senator, he never had a chance to learn the ‘chops’ of dealing with both sides of the partisan barrier, he was swept into office by a wave of sentiment and what people had hope for would be change, instead it has gotten worse and sad to say, Mr. Obama chose advisors who were very bad financial analysts and simply have not a clue what the people really want.
Too young, too unseasoned. That is the minus side

Second---the fact that people voted for a Black President, shows that the mentality of the American people has moved forward, it is a major breakthrough, and that is the plus side.

But it’s not enough to carry us through to positive resolutions---he has waffled on many issues, and now bringing in an aging former President---Bill Clinton to help sell the tax compromise, a former President who knows how to handle the press, and field questions.
A seasoned although tarnish president, somehow people do wonder, if it hadn’t been for that incident, what else he could have accomplished.

If he had left on a high note we most likely would have continued having Democratic presidents but then I believe that the Tax Rates would have been astronomical and out of sight. So what Bush did with the Tax Cut backs was a good thing, and we need to look further into what can be done using that premise to jump start the economy. We need to regenerate the Middle Class again, by doing that we can improve this nation back into the greatness that it can be.

Oh my, is that just wishful thinking? Maybe, but one has to start some place.

On a Christmas note, my shopping is done, not that I had a lot to do, my brothers, sisters-in-law and I have agreed that Christmas present giving is for the children, the young ones. And I still have a few, I was able to find out what they liked and managed.

Even Juanita and her family are limiting the gift giving to just the children and again, I managed. Juanita and I have been wrapping presents and carefully noting what goes to whom with my darling Princess, getting involved in the left over wrapping and ribbons, we were occasionally hearing her growl in delight and the different things we wrapped that were hers already, but we decided to play a game with her, need to keep doggie minds active.

My Ladies who lunch came over last Sunday and with pot luck we had a tree trimming party, it went up quickly, we all sat around and watched a DVD of “Miracle on 34th Street.” We all agreed that somehow those times seemed simpler although they were tough as well, but it just seemed simpler.

My home office has Christmas lights going around the window creating a festive air.

And Christmas decorations are out, Manuel put up the Christmas lights on the house for me. Princess, my little Diva Darling, is wearing a Christmas bow on her harness, it got stuck there and she doesn’t want it taken off for some reason.

I’ve seen the Nutcracker ballet, the Zoolights, have gone to the Dickens Fair twice, and we are planning to walk our local Christmas Tree Lane, we’ve got toys together and have given them to Toys for Tots, and my Brothers and I have donated money to several soup kitchens to help with Christmas dinners.

I’ll go to the City Sunday and just walk through the Stores on Union Square, and just have a little fun watching the matinee performance of “A Christmas Carol”, even though I know it will be raining, I’ll just take BART and bus. It will take time but I don’t feel the need to rush.

Then the week before Christmas, I’ll go a few days before to my Brother’s in San Francisco with Princess with me. Juanita will go to her family but I’ve made arrangements for a house sitter, Ralph a friend who has done it before and is happy to have a place right now, he got burnt out of his apartment, right now he’s at a hotel while he goes through what has survived, but he’ll be coming over tonight for dinner, and we’ll make arrangements for him to stay in the guest room.

I was afraid to leave him alone for Christmas but he’ll be going to a relatives’ house for the Day. Then when I get back we’ll work together on dealing with his insurance claim.

In a strange way he’s sort of glad, he says he can start fresh and down size things a bit. I just hope it isn’t shock, but then he has always looked forward never back.

I had the pleasure of running into my dear friend “Mean Kitty” a week or two back. She was shopping for a gift for an ornament exchange at T.J. Max and she found a beautiful one, Lennox china in the shape of a snow flake with the word in gold saying “Believe”. She told me if one of the participants’ girls are there at the party she knows that they will be fighting to get it.

And I understand that did happen, I told her I was planning an extensive dinner party and invited her and her man but she declined sadly as it conflicted with another party, I said I was looking for plates that would work with the Christmas china that I already had and she lifted this decorator pillow and there they were----Lennox Christmas China!! It didn’t matter that it was a discontinued pattern it was There!!!

We were like two school girls looking for all the matching pieces I couldn’t believe it we had enough plates, desert/salad plates and cups to match plus 2 sets of cream and sugar, and several serving platters.

She happen to have a shopping cart, so to use her phrase “we loaded up”, then she recommended that we look for the soft cases used to store good china and we found those! Then with her sharp eye she spotted several Spode china pieces for the or’deuvers and candy and the usual veggie and cheese platters.

Fortunately I have a very large credit line with T.J.Max and since I always do itemized deductions, I’m going to see if I can write this off, since the people that are coming to this party will be donating money to one of the charities that I help to sponsor. “Mean Kitty” has a very good eye finding things.

So I offered to buy her and her man coffee at the nearby Starbucks, and being the little elf I encouraged her to get the ginger bread cake, as she indulged in a Pumpkin spice Latté, her man being basic, went for the house blend and a glazed donut.

We had fun catching up, but I was a bit worried about her, she does so much for other people including her man, she’s put her credit and her indebtedness on the line to please him although I think he doesn’t realize that, that sometimes I wonder if her man really understands and appreciates her, I think he does but I think he is not aware what extend of what she has done, and she says she really doesn’t like to put herself out there but she does without realizing it.

She’s even going to take a friend of hers to the hospital for out patient surgery so her friend doesn’t have to worry about transportation. At it will be during “Mean Kitty’s” vacation. She tells me “I take the time off, because I need to breathe and work on some projects at home, that’s what I’m planning to do for the upcoming year, and besides we’ll be going down during the summer to do our history docent work.”

But I asked her “What are you doing for yourself?” and she said “Oh we don’t have money in the budget for that, as long as I have a change of scene I’m fine.”

I took a good long look at her, she has an eye for good things, but can’t afford them, she knows what would look good on a person and gives off ideas to people for their events that they claim as their own, she is idea talented as oppose to being talented in writing, art, music, theatre or dance, (although I’ve seen her act and she’s very good) she doesn’t entertain, no space in her house; family has imposed their possessions upon her upon their death that she has been trying to unburden herself from for years, she sold her beloved car that I know she misses. She used up her funds for years to help her family so she has to work until she dies because she couldn’t put it into a retirement fund. Because she loves her man she bought a house that’s a money pit instead of getting out of debt and renting an apartment instead.

I hate to pity her because in her own way she’s happy, she’s a survivor, she makes do and she enjoys the little things that come along. And she works to make other people happy without even trying. And yet she claims that she’s selfish. Selfish?? I don’t think so.

So on the spur of the moment, I got up and saw a cup that I knew she admired and bought it for her, it was red with white designs (yes Christmas designs) and gold trim on the top and gave it to her. She said that I didn’t have to, but I said “Oh yes I do, how else can I repay you for helping me with all that China”, I could see the delight in her eyes at the cup and knew she was going to enjoy it for a long, long time.

My party was a success and raised quiet a bit of money, I had it catered so all my dear Juanita had to do was just heat, and it was served buffet style, after all I’m not having her wait hand and foot, then afterwards, I told Juanita to not wash the dinners and things that evening, the next day we worked together hand washing and wiping everything and putting it all carefully away, although I have left out the Spode dishes with Christmas candy.

Right now I’m relaxing typing this, Juanita is putting together a tempting dinner, the house is festive. I’m going to check to see if it’s a spare the air day or not, if it is then I’ll burn candles in the fire place. Ralph will be here at 6 and we’ll have a glass of wine.

On the economy front, I’m still putting my thoughts together. So many buzzing in my head.

Until the New Year Have a Happy Holiday Season, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanaka, Happy Kwanza, Happy Boxing Day and all the Best for the New Year.

Until Anon my Diva Darlings

Being "Frugal and Hunting Bargains" are in Style~~~

Hello All You Darling Divas!!

I know Darlings; I’ve been away for just too long. And don’t I realize that!

But so much has been happening in my life. Where do I start?

First, I am now an adopted Grandmamma, Juanita’s daughter Constance gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl on October 30. The baby was a surprise to everyone, and a welcomed one.

And why am I an adopted Grandma? Constance and her husband have medical insurance but it doesn’t quite stretch to meet all the bills and although she was and is working full time, he had been out of work for a while but getting by with temporary and odd jobs and now finally has a full time job, so with 4 other children to feed and clothe it does get hard, yes 2 boys and 2 girls. As Manuel says quite a full house, so I’m helping to pay the medical bills for the baby.

When Constance came home with the baby I gave Juanita time off to help get Constance settled in with the new baby, and what I’m doing is having Juanita have more days off to be with Constance so she can rest and get into a routine with the baby.

One thing has Constance and Manuel worried is baby care because Constance can only take 4 months off from her work. She took the final month of her pregnancy off and will only have 3 months to be with the baby before she goes back to working as a secretary/ receptionist at her job and with the economy being the way it is she doesn’t want to lose it.

So Moi made a suggestion, my house is right on the way to where Constance’s job is, she can leave the baby with Juanita, we can have a complete set of baby things at my home, including disposable diapers, and Juanita can watch the baby during the day and then Constance can pick the baby up on the way home.

Juanita was worried that she might not be able to do things for me at the house, but I said that with the two of us and with “Molly Maids” from time to time, we should be able to give Constance peace of mind. It’s not like I’m a handful to take care of and I’m quiet capable of grocery shopping, taking things to the cleaners and such, although with having Juanita around it does make it easier in case a repair person is needed and I have to leave to take care of business.

And Constance’s older daughters and the boys can watch the baby while Constance is preparing dinner and they can help around the house as well. Which as I understand it, is not a problem since that is part of their responsibilities anyway.

So it’s a matter of adjusting our routines. And I have another little one to spoil as well.

Now about the economy-----Well Darlings, I don’t have to tell you that it is in “the toilet”. And such changes that are happening, even I have a hard time to keep up with it.

Fortunately my “Ladies Who Lunch” still get together and so far they have been riding out the ups and downs fairly well, with adjustments.

Can I tell you what to do in general about things? Sad to say No I can’t, because each individuals situation is unique, but there are some general things that you can do.

An important thing is to pay attention to the business reports especially about banking policies; recently it came out that two banking institutions were in the process of charging fees on good customers. How ridiculous is that!

One of my “Ladies” told me that the minute she heard about that she started looking into another institution that doesn’t do that.

Another told me that she left her credit union because they wanted her to keep more in her savings than before and if it went below a certain amount she would be charged a “maintenance fee”, what also aggravated her is that the closest branch closed and moved away from the business hub to a less accessible location for her, and the ATM is never properly maintained, I would say that is reasons to quit that institution and go with another.

So all you Diva Darlings, always keep a close eye on those extra fees that they are charging, and always read those little extra mailers that they send you that “tell” you of those changes, they are required by law to do that. And if they don’t, COMPLAIN AND COMPLAIN LOUDLY---if need be take it up a notch---speak with a supervisor---demand quality service---they are making money on your money anyway---the money that you put into their banks they use to make investments and purchases, so keep an eye if they are investing wisely.

One of my “Ladies” whom happens to know my dear friend “Mean Kitty” took a very hard hit, the bottom line is husband divorced her and left her in serious debt, she is of course trying to get some recourse, but it has been two years in the process, so she was forced to declare bankruptcy.

In a way she was lucky, she was awarded it, but she sold almost everything, there were no children involved, but she did find out that he had fathered a child by another woman who is going to be “new wifey” having seen an engagement ring with a rock big enough to choke a Shetland pony.

She met the woman in a friendly meeting, saw the baby, knew at once it was going to be an ‘ugly child’ and would need a lot of help, my “lady” told me that she hoped the child was ‘brilliant’ to help make it’s way in the world. Her words not mine.

Of course she didn’t say that to the Mother, no need to be cruel, but said that she hope the Mother and her Ex had an interesting life together. But also told her what her Ex-had done to her and warned the Mother to be on her guard with him and that she was compelled by law to seek some restitution from her Ex because it was not properly divided since this is a community law state.

She apologized to the new wife of her Ex and mother of his child, but said that it was the law, and she was only seeking that which is fair, and said she had no animosity towards the new wife and especially not to the idea of her Ex having a child.

She said that if the Ex would simply let their respective lawyers handle all the arrangements it would be nice to avoid court costs with the exception of the final judgment by the Judge and allow each of them to get on with their lives, and that either way her Ex would still come out of it in good shape. She even said that she would not seek any portion of her Ex’s retirement fund, if he allowed the lawyers to do “their thing”.

My lady told me that she at first thought that “new wifey” to be would become very upset, but instead was very reasonable, especially when she told “new wifey” about some of the hidden assets the Ex had that “new wifey” to be didn’t know about.

The final results were that she got what she wanted to make things better for herself, and she and “new wifey” are secret friends behind Ex’s back.

But because of the bankruptcy taking a hit on her credit score she cannot hold a credit card.

But she found out that check debt cards work like a credit card, so what she did is open a second checking account with the same bank and has been depositing extra cash into that debt card and maintaining running book keeping on it. She also has it linked to a savings account so that every month at the end of the month $25.00 is shifted into her savings.

She has found that with her no longer having to worry about those debts that she had, she has more freedom to exercise her choices on what she needs, or wants. And that is the difference.

One always has to discerned between the difference of a need and a want----

A NEED is something that you need to have if you want to have some function in life,--- for example if in your job it’s important to have a laptop, a DSL line or Wifi and a cell
Phone That is a NEED. Having an Iron and Ironing Board to press out your clothes is a Need. Being able to buy food is a need, having medical and dental insurance is a Need.

A WANT is something you desire, but is NOT necessary for you to function in life----

Example: a cell phone with all sorts of Apps so you can get onto Twitter and Face book, since that is not really necessary in your life it is only a Want. Expensive crystal wine glasses are a Want not a need. Buying a Gucci Handbag is a Want not a need. A plasma screen T.V. that is 72 inches is a Want not a need. Having a Mani-Pedi every two weeks is a Want not a need, when you can get by having it only once a month or not at all.

Another thing as all agreed upon by my “Ladies Who Lunch” being Frugal and hunting for Bargains is the new “In-Thing” even among those who can afford things.

One of my Ladies told me she got a CVS card with the CVS stores that use to be Longs in our Area; she gets coupons with purchases that she makes, especially if she purchases CVS products. She also buys her milk at CVS anyway because where she’s at it’s $2.49 a gallon compared to $2.99 at most grocery stores, and when she uses her CVS card it drops to $2.29 a gallon, and if she has an extra discount coupon that says “Real California Cows” she can get 50 cents to a $1.00 off a gallon of milk.

She has also discovered the 99 cents Hallmark cards, and uses them for birthdays, and special occasions, yes she does have to pay 44 cents for postage but she says that she enjoys the personal touch with a card.

She has also used the $20 dollar coupon from Wal-Mart that says you can buy a Thanksgiving dinner for 8 for $20 this includes a 12 pound turkey; she has used it and says that turkey is going to be used for dinner, soup, casseroles, and sandwiches.

So the word is to all you Darling Divas the New In Thing is being FRUGAL AND HUNTING BARGAINS.

But frankly my Dear Divas, as being a Diva that should also be your Mantra.

Must go my Dears Irma has come by to take me out to Brunch and since Juanita is at Constance’s home spoiling the baby, my time is my own.

Until Anon, Kisses.